Blog 3: Self-Regulation Strategies for Self & Others

After reading Chapter 3 of our text, I have come to the conclusion that there are some strategies that I have mastered and there are some that I have not. Two strategies I feel I have mastered are setting realistic goals and regulating my emotions and behavior while trying to reach said goals, and the other is avoiding negative emotions as much as possible. I have come to realize that throughout my life and the many ups and downs that comes with it, that setting goals has become a priority, and realistic ones at that. As a kid growing up, you aspire to become rich and famous and have all the amazingly expensive things in the world; however as you get older you realize that isn’t always possible and so then you set goals. More times than not your first goals are so out of reach that you become frustrated when you do not meet them, it’s impossible. Baby steps are my motto, start off small and work up from there. I always try to make myself realize that certain goals take set amounts of time and to become frustrated over them is more detrimental, then you just want to give up. Now I know what my goals are, I know how long it will take and I’m ok with that, I’ve come to terms. The other strategy is avoiding negative emotions. The last couple years have been hell on emotions; losing over 7 family members it sure can take a toll on you physically and mentally. However I have learned that you must push on, you must persevere and if you let the crappy emotions overtake you, you’re only setting yourself back even further. Every day I do something strictly for myself, whether it’s watching a movie, getting a cup of coffee from the shop or just sitting outside enjoying the day. I do what I need to clear my head of all that negativity and make room for happy thoughts. Believe you and me, happy thoughts were nonexistent a few months ago, but learning from the death of my dad, and how he enjoyed every last minute he had on earth and he never once let a bad thought get him down. He kept thinking good thoughts to the very end, which is enough to make me say “hey, ok if he can do it, I sure as heck can too”. One strategy I want my young daughter to master is realizing that she can make a difference in life, not just hers. She’s just ten and at that tender age life is at a crossroads, you can go down the bumpy path, or take the smooth road. I wish she knew just how amazing she is, and what a ray of sun she has been and is to so many people around her.

One strategy that I wish to master is being aware of my stress level. I usually don’t pay attention to it and then it’s too late and I blow up….at everything and those around me (never the kids though).  I am always so busy caring for my family and I don’t realize how negatively the stress of it all is affecting me.

Blog #2 Heuristics and Biases

 

Heuristics at work:

When it comes to heuristics, the one that pops out in my mind the most is representativeness heuristics. That being said there is one situation in which this came into play. I am a 31 year old mother of 4 and I have multiple visible tattoos on my back, leg, arms. When someone sees me they might think “oh, that lady has so many tattoos and she’s young and it’s the middle of the day. She must be an unemployed leech of society collecting welfare and food stamps while wasting her money on tattoos rather than supporting her own self.” When in stark reality I am a stay at home mom working towards a photojournalism degree while raising 4 children and also attend church 2 times a week every single week; I also volunteer at my kid’s school and do many different charity events.

 

 I find this extremely annoying because not only do a majority of people in this world have some sort of body art, they are also hard working, contributing members of society. Just because we have body art we are assumed heathens, criminals, or bums. The existing ideas of society pertaining to this issue is what “pigeon-holes” us into a category of ill repute. I have stopped trying to argue my case to those who think this way; instead I live my life how I should and lead by example rather than cheap talk. Many are truly surprised when they see me coming out of church or at a fundraiser event, sometimes it is only then that they may change their minds on the subject; but that is very rare.

 

My favorite bias:

 

Confirmation bias: The tendency to recall or interpret information in a way to confirm one’s beliefs or hypotheses. The reason that this particular type of bias most intrigued me is because to look at today’s religious wars is to plainly see this type of bias in action. We have several different religions that use their holy book and interpret it in ways they see to fit their terrorist agendas. They go on claiming that killing all those who are not affiliated with that religion to cleanse the earth of the “unwanted”. Christians, Muslims, Buddhists, Pagans, Catholics, the list goes on and on. It is not always associated with terrorism either, the subject can be related to contraception, the existence of Heaven or Hell, the way a person should live their lives, what commandments can be broken while still believing there would be a way to make the journey and entry into the afterlife. It would take eons to decipher each religions skewed view and misinterpretations by extremists.

 

The one bias that I usually see in myself, friends or family is the hindsight bias. We all like to claim that we knew what was coming but we kept hush hush because we are all too superstitious to “jinx” it by saying what would happen first. I myself have fell victim to this many times, especially when I hear of sad situations. I claim to have known what would happen all along because of the circumstances leading up to it.

 

Faulty Schemas:

 

The schema that has always been most present in my life is the thought that those who have worked in an office, at a desk most their lives do not know the true meaning of hard work. Obviously this is one instance in which I have been wrong multiple times, but I still continue to hold on to this notion. The implications were that many of those I categorized into this schema had in fact had previous jobs in which they were particularly grueling, labor intensive and hard on the body and mind, hence why the change of employment. I still to this day am struggling with the concept that this is not always true. The reason behind this in the first place was that my grandpa and dad always taught me that if you didn’t have callused hands and wind chapped cheeks you weren’t working hard enough. That you can get more satisfaction from knowing you did a good job because you are achy, sore and beat then rolling around in a chair playing with computers all day.

Social Psychology Blog Post #2

                              

  I'm intrigued by.........

 

     The topic in social psychology that seems utterly fascinating to me is Social Cognition, specifically Schemas. The reason behind this is because schemas are our own general ideas and thoughts about the world, and we all know that with each person the schema is vastly different. How we perceive the world varies by person and it is that thought process which is a mystery and almost always can explain the behaviors of certain people. It is this type of thinking that inhibits us from allowing any other information to be processed and leads to prejudice. What I find so amazing about this, is that it is the influences of the outside world that ultimately influences are views on the world. We have a certain amount of knowledge that we can process effectively but should we be overloaded new almost shut down and are unable to process that info, thus we file away key pieces into categories that don’t even apply to it. However with that also comes the fact that we are constantly reviewing and changing our views because of new information. The ability to either go with the flow or become a rock in a moving stream is neat.

     The following link is to an article that speaks on racism and the unconscious racism. She goes on to say that society is subjected to certain viewpoints derived from certain sources and more times than not those sources are biased towards a certain thought, racial group, etc. Since we only process certain things because we refuse to allow our thoughts and views to change thus only stick with those biases.

                Summary:

 

"In the blink of an eye, unconscious bias was visible to me, an African American. A man saw my face as I [author Jean Moule] walked into the store and unconsciously checked his wallet. On the street, a woman catches my eye a half block away and moves her purse from the handle of her baby's stroller to her side as she arranges the baby's blanket. In the airport, a man signals to his wife to move her purse so it is not over the back of her chair, which is adjacent to the one I am moving toward. What is happening in these instances? Were these actions general safety precautions? If so, why did the sight only of my brown face, not the others who moved among these individuals, elicit these actions? I believe these are examples of 'blink of the eye' racism. Such unconscious biases lead to unintentional racism: racism that is usually invisible even and especially to those who perpetrate it." (Phi Delta Kappan) Author Jean Moule reviews current studies and research on people's unconscious racism and stereotypes. Moule concludes that "Individuals need to become less focused on feeling very tolerant and good about themselves and more focused on examining their own biases" and to search for the cause of the bias, stressing how "One must realize and accept that the foundation and continuation of a bias may have, at its root, personal and group gain."

     “And when we receive evidence that confronts our deeply held and usually unrecognized biases, the human brain usually finds ways to return to stereotypes. The human brain uses a mechanism called "re-fencing" when confronted with evidence contrary to the stereotype.” It is this type of behavior, this type of social cognition that intrigues me, because how can a person structure their views and allow certain parts to be altered but others to not? Why does it almost always come down to race and or ethnicity?

     Shifting gears we are confronted in situations where we or others can highly underestimate the power of what is going on. We try to explain certain thoughts or behaviors but can’t or won’t open our eyes to the blatant truth because of our biases. One instance was that my dad always called me the protector of the underdogs. I was always trying to find the good or the slightly positive side to things. I remember as a small child hearing about a fight between two people that was based on racism issues. I tried to explain away the behavior of the person at fault because at that point I didn’t grasp the whole concept of the fight to begin with. I didn’t realize it was because one person called the other a derogatory name pertaining to their race. All I knew was that two people were fighting and one started it and that was the person I was trying to defend. I didn’t grasp the power of the situation and the true meaning.

 

References

Moule, J. (2009, Understanding unconscious bias and unintentional racism. Phi Delta Kappan Vol.90 no.5, , 321-326. Retrieved from http://sks.sirs.com





But that's not really me!

Blog post #1

 

Hello world and fellow classmates! This blog is dedicated to my Social Psychology class and all assignments. First off let me introduce myself, my name is Amanda but I usually go by Mandy. Ok, let's get this rolling, I remember one time in particular when I was working with my dad in his welding shop I was speaking with a contractor about an upcoming job and for the life of me I could not remember the name of a certain material. I kept repeating the same thing over and over and he kept arguing with me that I was wrong. In my mind I knew what I was talking about, and he was talking about the same thing but it was the lack of communication ( and proper names) that made the conversation very uncomfortable and going nowhere. I was only after I got off the phone with him and a few days later that he came into the shop and I corrected myself and bluntly said I was having a major brain fart. Even though at first he didn't think I knew what I was talking about, after correcting myself we both were on good terms.

Ok, fast-forward to today. There has been a lot that has happened in the last couple years. My family has lost 7 family members from the age of 7 days old to 90 years old. My cousin lost her fiancé to the Yarnell Hill fire, her brother and wife lost their baby girl after 7 days, lost two great men to heart attacks, two from old age and my dad who passed from brain cancer and short 46 days after diagnosis. To say this last year and half has been rough in an understatement. Please don't be offended by my sharing of my current life right now, I found it's best to share than to keep it bottled up inside. Good news is that my husband and I are expecting our 4th child sometime this Fall. It always helps to have some good news after a rough year. I am "back in the saddle" of the whole college class thing now, trying to finish up my general degree so that I can pursue something in the field of either photojournalism or criminal profiling/justice, so very different paths I know. Well, I hope you enjoy a small glimpse into my life, I'm sure there will be more to come. Take care and God bless!